Get ready to enjoy our hilarious selection of Christmas puns to light up your holidays! with Santa Claus puns, Christmas dad jokes and Christmas one-liners, so let the laughter begin!
Here are the top 120 funny Christmas Puns to make your weekend with a laugh. These are the funniest jokes about Christmas humor for both kids and adults which they are going to love with a laugh.
Funny Christmas Puns
- Did you hear that Santa’s helper retired? He lost his elf interest!
- Why is frosty never hungry? Because he’s always frosted!
- Why was Santa checking his list twice? Because he was checking it thrice last year!
- What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle!
- How do snowmen keep their pants up? With an icy belt!
- What happened to the thief who stole a Christmas calendar? He got 25 days!
- Why was Santa’s assistant jealous? Because Santa gets all the ho ho hos!
- How do snowmen travel around? By riding an “icicle”!
- What do Santa’s helpers learn at school? The elf-abet!
- Why was Santa late to deliver presents? His elf broke down on the shelf!
- Why are Christmas trees the worst at knitting? They are always dropping their needles!
- How do sheep greet each other on Christmas Day? Merry Christmas to ewe!
- What lights up a soccer stadium? A soccer match!
- Why couldn’t Santa become a fisherman? Because he could only fly fish!
Cat Christmas Puns
- Batting at tinsel makes cats merry!
- Clawing into that Christmas tree again?
- Cat gone catatonic from decorations!
- Not a jolly feline in that hat!
- Just some prowling, purry Christmas kitties.
- Cozy and paw-zy by the fireplace.
- Batting low ornaments? Claw-iday fun!
- Tree toppling catastrophe – how unfur-tunate!
- Very meow-y Christmas card ready this year.
- Feeling mighty claw-tacular under that tree!
- Snatching holiday purr-key scraps again!
- Carol love means great mew-sical taste.
- Shredded Santa suit. No more cheer!
- Curiosity caught those light stealing cats!
- Just doesn’t get the claw-it of Christmas!
- Chewed lights – what an electri-frying sight!
- Nativity scene had those cats purring.
Christmas Dad Jokes
- Why can’t Elsa hold onto a balloon? Because she will let it go….let it go!
- How do sheep say Merry Christmas in Mexico? Fleece Navidad!
- What nationality is Santa Claus? North Polish!
- 29. How do you know if Santa is good at karate? He has a black belt in “jingle bells”!
- Why do Santa’s reindeer stop working hard at the end of the day? So they can deer down!
- What do you call an elf who tells jokes? A “giggle”byte!
- Why is Christmas just like my job? I do all the work and some fat guy in a suit gets all the credit!
- Why did no one bid for Rudolph on eBay? Because he was two deer (too dear)!
- Why do Christmas trees make bad knitters? They keep dropping their needles!
- Why did the Christmas cookie go to therapy? It needed to crumble out its feelings!
- What’s a frozen Christmas tree’s favorite magazine? Tim-burr Home and Garden!
- What’s Santa’s favorite hobby? Building snowmen – he’s an expert at “snow-craft”!
Santa Claus Puns
- Why did Santa have to take up yoga classes? All those chimneys were giving him Claus-trophobia!
- Our family loves to regift. All our Christmas puddings make excellent re-wrapping practice paper.
- Why doesn’t Santa Claus have any children? Because he only comes down chimneys!
- Did you know Santa is considering changing his delivery service’s name? To Reindeer One!
- What kind of pictures does Santa Claus like taking during the holidays? ‘Elfies!
- Why was Santa Claus facing discrimination in his grocery store workplace? Elfism!
- What were the reindeer doing when Santa caught them slacking on the job? Elfies on Insta-Prancer!
- What do snowmen wear on their heads? Ice caps!
- Why are Christmas trees the worst at sewing? They always drop their needles!
- How much did Santa pay to park his sleigh? Nothing, it was on the house!
- What did Adam say on the day before Christmas? It’s Christmas, Eve!
- Why was Scrooge so mean? Because the cold made him frosty!
Christmas Tree Puns
- Why was the Christmas tree always in trouble? It had too many “pine”-alties!
- What do you call a Christmas tree that knows karate? Spruce Lee!
- How do Christmas trees stay in shape? They “trim” their branches!
- Why did the Christmas tree get a job? It wanted to branch out in its career!
- What did one Christmas tree say to another during a game? “I’m stumped!”
- Why are Christmas trees bad at sewing? They always drop their needles!
- What’s a Christmas tree’s favorite type of music? Tree-carols!
- What do you call a sad Christmas tree? Blue Spruce!
- Why did the Christmas tree bring a ladder? It wanted to reach new heights!
- How do you compliment a Christmas tree? “You’re tree-mendous!”
- What’s a Christmas tree’s favorite part of a computer? The “enter” key!
- How do Christmas trees communicate? They “spruce” up their conversation!
- What do you get if you cross a Christmas tree and a dog? A tree-hound!
- Why did the Christmas tree bring a backpack? It wanted to be a “tree-k”!
- What’s a Christmas tree’s favorite book? “The Fir-narnia Chronicles”!
- How do Christmas trees keep in touch? They “twig” each other on social media!
- Why did the Christmas tree go to school? It wanted to be a smart “fir”-st!
- What do you call a Christmas tree with a lot of friends? Popular-pine!
- How do Christmas trees solve problems? They “fir-give” and “fir-get”!
Christmas Puns One Liners
- Holiday tip: Reindeer can’t grab cash so pay them in carrots.
- Santa’s checking his list twice to see who deserves coal after this year.
- Sorry Santa, the fireplace is decked out in stockings tonight.
- Holiday carolers or cats in heat? Hard to tell the difference.
- My snowman brought all the birds to the yard. Then they destroyed him.
- Jingle my bells one more time and see what happens, carolers.
- Santa’s installing a chimney camera this year after Rudolph’s peeping incident.
- Caught Santa kissing the neighbor’s Mrs. Claus last night. Awkward!
- Caroler Rule #1: No belting out Jingle Bells before Thanksgiving ends!
- Trimmed the tree with boozy tinsel and vodka ornaments this year.
- Making a list and checking it twice to see who’s getting stale fruitcake this year.
- Caught the elf on a shelf going through my underwear drawer again.
- Ice, ice Rudolph! Stop peeing all over the North Pole, dude!
- Canceling Christmas ’til this family learns to act right!
- Yup, pretty sure my Secret Santa just re-gifted my present from last year.
- Jingle Belled the neighbors’ cat last night. Rudolph is so dead when I find him.
- Kids, if Mommy’s drunk kissing Santa again, just walk away quietly.
- The chestnuts weren’t the only things roasting on the open fire last night!
- Here comes Bad Santa stumbling around the mall, reeking of gin. Awesome!
- Hands off the tree, Grinch! Grow your own if you want one so bad!
- Caught Santa stealing credit for my fully-stocked bar. Not so jolly now are ya, St. Nick?
- Hey Santa, ease up with the “ho, ho, ho-ing” this year. Mrs. Claus has questions.
- If Mariah Carey dares to blast “All I Want for Christmas” today I’ll scream.
- Holiday Spirits Rule #1: Anything poured in a red cup will do in a pinch!
- Seriously, who invited creepy elf on the shelf to Christmas this year?
- Rudolph, stop threatening to hold out for extra carrots or your red nose is getting it!
- Caroling Rule # 1: No taking a knee for song requests outside my house!
- Attention Santa: we don’t say ho, ho, ho here anymore. Check your privilege.
- Apologies if chestnuts roasting on this open fire smell a little, uh, herbaceous this year.
- Fair warning carolers, one more round of “Faaaaa la la la la” gets a snowball to the Frost(y) bits!
- Holiday baking disaster: How was I supposed to know the kids got into the special brownies?!
- Note to creepy elf on our shelf: stop stealing my good lipstick for Rudolph’s shiny nose!
- Caught Santa on camera pranking our naughty neighbor! My hero!
- Santa better not aw shucks and bail early this year or I’m returning everyone’s junk!
- Caroling dressing code folks: Underwear goes UNDER the Santa costumes!
- Apologies if my holiday spirit smells like Grandma’s old eggnog and bourbon.
- Jingle Bell Rock block party at midnight! Lock up your wives, Santa’s coming to town!
- Note to carolers: hearing “Silent Night” 132 times isn’t that silent. Or peaceful.
- Aw jeez, Uncle Santa’s making moves on the fake tree again. Someone cut him off!
- Psst… no one tell Santa but Dasher’s been doping to make the sleigh pull faster!
- Fair warning Santa: last year’s gift bomb better not be followed with a stink bomb tonight!
- Jingle bell restraining order still active folks – keep those clangers away from my door!
- This year’s resolution: figure out how many female reindeer Santa’s really got tucked away up there.
- Santa broke bad this year! Caught him growing his own mistletoe for the reindeer! Party on!
- Holiday baking mishap again! How was I supposed to know rum balls were actually boozy?! Kids.
- Santa’s twerking it under the mistletoe solo again. Can someone redirect him?
I hope these Christmas Puns bring a smile to your face! Enjoy the Christmas humor!
Final Thoughts
I hope these additional funny Christmas ouns brought a smile to your face! Remember, so feel free to share these with friends and family to spread the laughter!
If you want to laugh more here is a list of more funny jokes that you gonna love and laugh at:
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